Asia would have been 31 today..

I am not sure quite what I need to write tonight But I feel I NEED to write something.. This is a picture of my friend Kelly from the last night we were with Asia. May 8th, before Asia was murdered on May 11th. So much has happened in 10 short weeks, since she's been gone. I really wonder what she would think about all the events. I really wonder...

I have been in a season of transition in those 10 weeks. When you lose someone close to you, it really makes you re-think life, and what you want out of life. And how much you can give more to people. In order to leave a lasting change on this world when I am gone. Asia majorly impacted me. Her straight forwardness, that was amazingly not harsh, really made me think. She was not perfect, and neither am I. But right now I feel called to a high standard. I have had moments of calm, where I have been able to listen for God's still small voice. It is truly amazing to realize he is always talking to us, because when we ask him to come and be apart of us, he is always there.. always there talking to us and his power is always with us.

I don't know what God has in-store, but I am feeling some STRONG tugs on my heart and life. I am feeling direction, and a sense of being. I wasn't as focused this last month, I have had all different kinds of distractions, not bad ones.. just had a lot going on, and haven't spent the time alone in-order to find the peace within myself. But I have had time these last few days. Realizing I still have more to learn about myself, but also am aware of ALL the growth I have accomplished in just the last 11 months. And I am incredibly thankful for every experience I have had to get me to the place I am at now. I have no regrets. All that has happened has made me stronger. And helped me to draw closer to God and this dreams and plans for my life. I can't wait to see where I'll be next year :) or even in the next 10 weeks.

I had a good day today remembering my Friend and all she ment to me and how all these events have forever changed my life. It is amazingly great to see small "good" things coming from such a malice tragedy .. I will miss you Asia, but I know beyond a shadow of a doubt you are in God's hands. And I will see you again.

~Natalie